It was a dark and stormy night….

I couldn’t resist blogging this, despite being laid up with two severed tendons in my right hand for the next six weeks…

The results are in for the 2004 Bulwer-Lytton Contest (see the site for details if you don’t have a clue what it is….I can’t explain right now, typing with just my left is far too much work.)

Grand Prize Winner:

  

She resolved to end the love affair with Ramon tonight . . . summarily, like Martha Stewart ripping the sand vein out of a shrimp’s tail . . . though the term “love affair” now struck her as a ridiculous euphemism . . . not unlike “sand vein,” which is after all an intestine, not a vein . . . and that tarry substance inside certainly isn’t sand . . . and that brought her back to Ramon.

Dave Zobel, Manhattan Beach, CA


 

Runner-Up:

The notion that they would no longer be a couple dashed Helen’s hopes and scrambled her thoughts not unlike the time her sleeve caught the edge of the open egg carton and the contents hit the floor like fragile things hitting cold tiles, more pitiable because they were the expensive organic brown eggs from free-range chickens, and one of them clearly had double yolks entwined in one sac just the way Helen and Richard used to be. – Pamela Patchet Hamilton, Beaconsfield, Quebec

And my personal favorites….

The legend about Padre Castillo’s gold being buried deep in the Blackwolf Hills had lain untold for centuries and will continue to do so for this story is not about hidden treasure, nor is it set in any mountainous terrain whatsoever. – Siew-Fong YiapKowloon, Hong Kong

 

It was a dark and stormy night–actually not all that dark, but more dusky or maybe cloudy, and to say “stormy” may be overstating things a bit, although the sidewalks were still wettish and smelled of ozone, and, truth be told, characterizing the time as night is a stretch as it was more in the late, late afternoon because I think Oprah was still on. – Gregory Snider, MDLexington, KY

Check out the site for more…

Now goodbye for six weeks…

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